Yes, no, maybe, I don´t know

In western society we are always expected to know exactly what we want. Which ice-cream flavour we like, what social scene we feel related to, what job we want, what goals and believes we want to pursue, you name it. If we can´t answer those and similar questions, it equals weakness and lack of character. (That especially applies to the ice-cream question, of course.)

As soon as you cross that bridge into your twenties, society expects you to know who you are, what you want and where you see yourself in 10 years. Literally. (That also makes Christmas at grandma´s as a single without an exact on-paper future plan for the next 10 years super fun.)

It´s perfectly human to pursue fulfillment and happyness, wonder about our own existence and purpose in life, true to the philosophical questions of life “ Who am I and if so, how many?” (Ouch, R. D. Precht sounds like an over used motivational tumblr quote now) but it´s also perfectly human to not have a paper-perfect answer right away, but we get frustrated with ourselves when we realize there is still some unclear business we stumble over during that crazy little thing called “growing up”. We are being constantly compared to our fellow students, colleagues, siblings and the girls/guys next to us. I´m going to say something that will sound like a Katy Perry song and you might want to throw up a little in your mouth, but anyway, here it goes: Don´t you ever compare yourself to someone else, because it´s like trying to fit a triangle into a circle. You are X, therefore you are not Y. Sheep flocks suck anyway. Except for actual sheeps. End of story.

Since it´s in my nature to always dig a little deeper and aspire I most of the time actually know what I want and what direction I want to follow, but there are of course still some blank papers and unanswered questions. Only like a million. Duh. So lately I came to appreciate the obscurities though. I´m even a firm believer that the twenties are there to teach us what we actually don´t want, don´t like, don´t want to be and don´t agree on. It´s a process of culling. So pick up that spade and don´t be afraid to find a lot of bullshit you feel like throwing out. You will find some gold below. Probably. 

May it be that ex- girl/boyfriend that taught you what kind of person you do not want to be with, may it be that job that teaches you what you definitely do not want to be spending your time with working on, or may it be that city you´re living in that you do not want to make your long-term home.

Knowing exactly what you don´t want helps you create space for everything you actually do want. It´s like throwing out trash before buying something new. 

Take it easy babes and don´t forget to take out the trash. xx